Tuesday, December 18, 2012

Big Golden Moment

Just the other day, I was sitting on the couch with my honey. We had music going in the background as we chatted away about anything & everything as we usually do. At some moment it dawned on me that I HAVE to give myself another Gold Moment!

I shattered both my left wrist & left ankle in a life changing auto accident 19 months ago. I was on 2 different pain killers at max dosage just to help me get through the day. As time went on I was still having terrible pain in my ankle & was put on an additional pain killer to help with the intense nerve pain. I had 6 surgeries within a year, so add in all the pain killers for those. Due to my Prostitus, I have spent 7 months on antibiotics alone not including all the other reasons I've have to be on them. I even got my first root canal this past summer. I've literally, at times, had to write down which med I was taking when or else I'd really have been messed up.

Emotionally...I have handled blow after blow after blow. I have had to stress like crazy about what work was going to do with me to the stress of now what to do after they've dropped me. Going from being on top of the Disney culinary world to not being hired because I'm a liability. I've had endless nights of me staring off into the ceiling worrying about cysts & cancers & blood tests & outcomes & pets & even loss. I'm constantly facing emotional obstacles that truly RIP & TEAR at the soul! I mean just as you think you've hit rock bottom...you find that it was only a bump on the way down & the ground that you just landed on is only a thin pane of glass....

Yet.....thru ALL THIS CRAP.....I have not one new addiction! I can honestly say that I have NOT found refuge in a bottle of meds NOR in a bottle of alchol NOR in a gun!!! Even against my own Sun Sign Pisces, thank heavens I am also a Dragon (read the opening blog for a refresher). I soooo very easily could have, just like SO many others, taken a dark path that I might not have been able to come out of. Instead.....I have kept my head up! I had a ton of love & support from the most wonderful of people...which kept me plugging forward. I have some of the HUGEST role models right within the family...guiding my way.

So I proudly take this Gold Moment! I will be glad to say that I did it & without any escapism other then my own creative mind. Matter of fact, because I am being partly forced into it, I am that much more driven to start my own business! There is also a HUGE Bonus gold point for being able to quit smoking & have stayed smoke free now for 1 year & 7 months...during all this!!!!!


1 comment:

  1. I think overcoming your smoking addiction is the biggest thing to be proud of!! Through out it all, smoking would have been easy to go back to. I'm very proud if you for not smoking! The boys have noticed too, and say uncle owiee USED to smoke but now he doesn't. I am so glad you did not get hooked on those damn pain pills. Even people who would never do drugs can become easily addicted. They scare me so bad that I have told mike if I am ever unable to say myself, for him to make sure I get non narcotic meds. Even taking them as prescribed causes addiction. No thanks!!!!
    Hoping 2013 is a better/healthier year for you.