Painting Through Written Imagery

Recently, while going through a bunch of my old stuff, I found a treasure trove of things that had been tucked away & long since forgotten. As I was going through these things, I came across an old school binder overflowing with my writings. I found poems, lyrics to songs & partial writings galore. As I was going through the mass amounts of scribbled words & typed lines, memories flooded my mind with each piece of paper. Some I remembered the exact moment the lines came to me & some I could barely make out what I was writing or where my mind was going.

Some of what I wrote was pretty good....actually....really good! Matter of fact, some were so good that either I or my teachers had entered them into different poetry contests. Of the 12 different entries that were submitted over the years, I placed 1st three times, 2nd Place three times & 3rd Place two times & have been published 6 times! My first time submitting a poem, I took 2nd Place & I was only 12 years old at the time.

Besides the poetry, I've written a lot of lyrics/songs. Back in the late 80's, I started up a rock band with my friends. I was the going to be the lead singer & therefore I took it upon myself to write the lyrics to all of our songs. Over those next few years, my bandmates changed as did our band name & by the time I was in high school my current band was doing pretty good. My writing was also getting better & better. I even had quite a few songs copywritten! By the time I was in my Junior year of high school, the music scene had changed, the band broke up & so ended my days of writing lyrics although I continued to write poetry throughout the rest of my school days.

Upon reading these poems & lyrics & scraps of written lines, I'm amazed at some of the subject matter that I was writing about. Now keep in mind I started writing when I was 11 years old. I wrote some really great pieces about love...being in love...falling in & out of love...all the pain that's associated with love. I wrote about death & despair...deception & revenge. I also wrote A LOT of sexual stuff. All of which are great writings but surprising in the maturity of which I wrote them. I very much intend on posting some of those songs & poems on here...so keep your eyes open for some fun & interesting writings from years ago.

Interestingly enough, I stopped writing altogether by the time I finished high school. The 1 exception was a poem that a friend & I wrote in 2004 although that was more of an accidental writing then a planned out decision. My friend submitted it to a writing contest & it went on to be published in a poetry book. Minus that poem, I have not written in over 10 years...until I started my first blog in 2008. That blog was dedicated to my culinary endeavors & to keep family & friends up-to-date on my life but it still was more fun factual writings based on events. Last year I ended that blog as my journeys started to lead me down different paths. Now I'm writing much more fun & interesting blogs allowing my mind to fully stretch the boundaries & write what's inside & even some fantastical stuff too...just like my writings of yester year. I guess that I've always had the creativity in me to paint great written & verbal imagery. It's good to be writing again!

Mourning The Loss of A Childhood Idol

Since I was a baby...I have been going to & enjoying a place entitled "The Happiest Place On Earth". I own films by this mega giant & have enjoyed them to the point that I know them word for word, song by song, start to finish. I have gone to the parks & spent countless amounts of my hard earned money supporting the company. I considered myself extremely lucky to be able to perform in the parks & actually sing in the studios. I dreamed of the day that I would be employed by this sweet dream of a company & proudly wore the costume I thought I had earned when I was actually employed by them. I even became one of their most prized employees. I fought word wars in their honor & gave up a huge piece of me to the eternal "happy place".

Now...I am completely broken hearted & in deep mourning over the loss of the dream that used to be so true to me. It's like waking up Christmas morning & finding no special presents under the tree from Santa Claus. It even hurts just as much as walking in & finding that special love of your life bedding someone who is not you. At first, I was in total denial. I blamed myself...I blamed the media...I just simply could not wrap my mind around the thought of something that I held soooo true & dear to my heart ultimately revealing itself to be a company that was just out for itself no matter what.

As one day led to the next, the realization started to settle in. The denial became a reality & now I find myself in complete dismay that something that claims to be such a great thing is absolutely no better then the one that takes candy from a baby just to turn around & throw the candy in the gutter while spitting in the baby's face & walking away laughing. I know that sounds really bad & I'm pretty sure that there are MANY out there that would have harsh words for me in retaliation...hell...I USED to be that person! Not any more. My eyes are very much wide open now & yet I'm STILL being punished by the company even though I'm no longer directly a part of it.

As I sit in this pained place of hurt & dismay...I'm constantly being reminded of how bad this company has gotten. In the past 3 weeks, the company has been in the news in not so flattering a light. They recently lost a law suit where they denied earned benefits to their employees. They are currently fighting against giving benefits like sick time & maternity leave. They are also battling against the FMLA standards. They are sinking their employees financially via over priced medical costs & even having employees pay back health benefits that they earned while working for them. Tonight I even heard on the news about this company being the second largest employer on this planet to be completely under-paying their employees.

Now what I'd like to know is....how can we continue to support a company that purposely has it's employees lie to it's patrons & yet takes total advantage of their employees in the process? They have their "Cast Members" smile & create "magic" all while also snapping the employees' kneecaps in the same breath. Do they not realize that without those employees...there would be NO "magic" in the first place?! The company now has several billion $$ empires but won't put that money into its own employee benefits. There are many employees that have spent their entire working lives there, only to be told that they are not fully vested when the time comes for retirement (yes this IS true as I'm partnered with one).

The "happiest place on Earth" should be relabeled "the worst company to work for on Earth". I want to make sure that you all know that I'm not simply a disgruntled ex-employee who has a bitter taste left in his mouth...but a person who is truly mourning the loss of his childhood idol. I make this plea to Disney: FIX THIS!!! You are ONLY as good as those whom you employ! Keep them happy so that the phrase "happiest place on Earth" also goes for "happiest place to work".

Quotables



This Is How I Feel Everyday

Gotta Wreck A Little Havoc Every Day

Remember This When Ever You Feel Ugly

Always Reach For Your Dreams Even If They Feel Impossible

Give Your Personal Wings The Attention They Need

Songs Convey What Most Won't Say

Love Comes In All Kinds Of Ways

Always Hold Dear Ones Closest To You

For All Those Times When Life Looks The Bleakest

Say It & Wear It Proudly

No Matter What...Just Be YOU

Don't Ever Just Give Up...Life's Worth The Fight



Yes....This One Is For You



Miracle

A penny for your thoughts now baby
Looks like the weight of the world's on your shoulders now
I know you think you're going crazy
Just when it seems everything's gonna work itself out
They drive you right back down

And you said it ain't fair
That a man walks
When a bird can fly
We have to kick the ground
The stars kiss the sky
They say that spirits live
A man has to die
They promised us truth
Now they're giving us lies

Gonna take a miracle to save us this time
And your savior has just left town
Gonna need a miracle 'cause it's all on the line
And I won't let you down
The river of your hope is flooding
And I know the dam is busted
If you need me I'll come running
I won't let you down... no, no

You're looking for salvation
You thought that it'd be shining like an angel's light, yeah
Well, the angels left this nation
And salvation caught the last train out tonight
He lost a hell of a fight

He said: "I'm just one man, that's all I'll ever be
I never can be everything you wanted from me
I've got big plans so big that any blind man could see
I'm standing in the river
Now I'm drowning in the sea

Gonna take a miracle to save us this time
And your savior has just left town
Gonna need a miracle 'cause your heart's on the line
And your heartbeat is slowing down
Your feet are grounded still you're reaching for the sky
You can't let 'em clip your wings 'cause I believe that you can fly

Well my eyes have seen the horror of the coming of the flood
I've driven deep the thorny crown into the soul of someone's son
Still I'll look you in the eye 'cause I've believed in things I've thought
And I'll die without regret for the wars I have fought

Gonna take a miracle to save you this time
And your savior has just left town
Gonna need a miracle 'cause your heart's doing time
And your conscience is calling you out
It ain't all for nothing
Life ain't written in the sand
I know the tide is coming
But it's time we made a stand with a miracle

Gonna take a miracle, I need a miracle
I need a miracle, I need a miracle 

A miracle..........JBJ

 

Jurassic Terrors

June 11, 1993...a film "65 million years in the making"...smashed, trampled & terrified us all the way to the top of the box office. It held the title of Biggest Film Ever until the story of a behemoth ship sinking took over the spot. Up to that point in the time of film making, we only knew stop-motion & go-motion mixed with puppets & merkets. Something very special happened in the hands of a director with an incredible vision, super thinking computers, a script full of science & scary truths, massive machines & dozens of workers. To this day, I am still tortured, tormented & all around terrified during deep sleep thanks to the extremely realistic Jurassic Park.

I remember being unimpressed with the thought of sitting through a movie filled with sad claymation...especially when it comes to dinosaurs since I've been a an enthusiast since I first gazed down at drawings of these massive creatures at age 4. I started hearing A LOT of big buzz about the movie & was not so against being taken to see it by 2 female friends. We ended up getting our tickets at the right time, well the right time to be taken to a line that wrapped around the building...TWICE! So we waited briefly as the next theater opened & the line started piling in to see the show. Unfortunately we didn't make that sitting BUT we were 5th in line for the next show. So we finally were let into the theater & I was dragged down to the 3rd row from the front & we sat in the center of the screen.

The movie opened up with that bone rattling boom...BOOM! Within the opening 2 minute scene...I was already a HUGE fan! I was loving everything I was watching & the moment when we first saw that huge dino walking across the screen... I was just blown away! Here in front of me was a real dinosaur...or so it felt. We then would go on to meet a sick
Triceratops, thanks to Stan Winston & all his creative genius (he was the creator of the Alien Queen in Aliens as well!), I truly & honestly felt that these creatures that were thought to be long since extinct...could actually be living amongst us!! I soooo wanted to jump up & put my arms around the sick Tric...& just be in the presence of such an astonishing beast! Of course, soon to be seen...a dinosaur that would haunt me forever!

I can honestly say that I have never felt such terror in life as I did when the T-Rex came walking in front of the vehicles in the torrential down pour. The entire time she was on the screen, I was just beyond terrified! Then it happened....the T-Rex opened its mouth & let out a scream that truly chilled me strait to the bone! I was frozen stock-still & I swear to you...I peed myself....not really....well...maybe just a little. At the end of the scene, I remember the realization of where I was, what was going on & how I felt. I was squatting on my seat as one of my friends was clinging in behind me, apparently using me as a protective shield. My other friend was on the ground & holding onto my legs as she peered out between the edges of the seats, AND...the middle-aged father sitting next to me had my other hand pinned to the arm rest as he was squeezing it in fear. So even if I had wanted to run....I simply couldn't!! After the scene, he realized what he was doing & apologized to me, only to continually repeat the pinning of me to the arm rest with his superman grip. Of course there were A LOT of those times in the movie all the way up to the last gigantic bellow from the terrifying & surprising hero of the movie!

By the time the movie ended, not only was I a believer that dinosaurs could actually be genetically engineered & roaming the planet, but I also became terrified that they truly are walking amongst us RIGHT NOW! I swear I could see Raptors in the shadows & T-Rex moving through the trees with each blowing wind. I have had over a dozen dreams about dinosaurs & I'm usually running/hiding/escaping from them but they just keep on coming. I have very vivid dreams in which I can see color, feel cold, smell food & even feel pain...so these dreams are very realistic & very terrifying! Even though it's been 20 years & I must have seen the movie truly hundreds of times, I'm still both in love with & terrified by dinosaurs. So what do I go & do...see it in IMAX 3D where my honey & I sat in row 3 front & center!! I still was frozen stone-cold when T-Rex called out directly at us! I still came outta my seat when the Raptor jumped up after Lexi's leg! I still sat with tears streaming down my cheeks as I first witnessed a sick Tric! I cracked up laughing in all of those "juice" moments that provided laughter after terror & held my breath in anticipation of what might be coming!

I am such a huge lover of the Jurassic Park series, that I alone account for at least 15% of it's total gross earnings. I dragged everyone I knew to the theaters to see each of the movies! If you hadn't seen it, you'd be sure to know that you soon would be! I have gone both alone & in large groups. To this day...there is nothing more terrifying to me then looking up at huge meat-eating machines with chompers packed full of teeth! Basically the land version of Jaws.

My personal favorite dino is the Stegosaurus. After reading the book, I was disappointed that it was replaced with the Tric for the part of the sick dino in the movie. I was then THRILLED that it showed up large in the second film. I even have my own little stuffed Stegosaurus that my cat used to drag around the condo while meowing about it.

I also became such a fan of dinosaurs that I have sought out my own fossil piece & have several dinosaur books. Now there is a Jurassic Park IV--Extinction coming in June, 2014! Well...you know I'll be there opening weekend, sitting front & center in that 3rd row! Although I seriously doubt I'll be having any popcorn!

Long Live The Terrifying Gift of Jurassic Park!!!

Celebrity Encounters

The other night I was sitting around reminiscing about past events with my honey. As we were chattering away through these tasty morsels of memories past, an interesting boost to the ego came. Over the years I have had the opportunity to work for & with some pretty high profile people. How often do we get the chance to shake hands with corporate big wigs, dine with divas & personally feed the paparazzi princes & princesses. There have been enough times over the years that I've actually started to not notice the status of "celebrity" any more & don't want people thinking I'm name dropping or showing off. But I've also had some really interesting encounters that I was told really should be written down. So...with a little pushin'...here's just a tasting of a few of my celebrity encounters.

 

 

The first time I ever met someone called a "celebrity" it was Alice Cooper & I was 17. At that time, I was the administrative assistant at a high-end law firm where my mother worked as well. I remember how the office was all abuzz about him coming in, so that day I made sure everything in the office was in tip-top shape! Now, my mom was a big fan  of his from back in his early days & that bled down to us kids. To this day we still enjoy getting the latest release of his. So you know we were both coming out of our skins! He came in, very unassuming & down to earth. We all shook hands & met each other, the business meeting continued & then it was back to work as normal. Best part of this story....during the meeting, his wife Sheryl's contact lens had popped out & I was called in to help find it & take care of it for her. That's one way to meet a celebrity!

Another big moment for me happened a few years back. I was working in the kitchen of 1900 Park Fair & was working the hot line B station. This station is responsible for the cooking of all the non-protein items like corn & rice & mashed potatoes & such. Well I had been working that station for awhile & since I take a great deal of pride in the food I produce, I took each of my items & gave them the Bret kick! Late in service one night (very late to be exact), the floor chef came in & asked me to follow him into the dining room. I was led to the private section & was introduced to a Queen of a foreign country (unfortunately I'm not to divulge exactly where but that's really not the point anyway..lol). She then told us that MY mashed potatoes where "Out-Of-This-World!" & personally thanked me for making the dining experience well worth it! Well not only did I walk back into the kitchen on cloud 9 but the chef then proceeded to tell EVERYONE in the kitchen what just happened! Great way to meet a celebrity!

 
 
Most recently, I came eye to eye with a celebrity that was in the closest of literal terms as you can get. At the time, I was working at the Grand Floridian as the Concierge Chef. It was early evening & I was bustling around taking care of the lounges & special requests. I was hurrying back into the kitchen to get something needed & to do so, I had to go through the private elevator area & into the back hallway to the kitchen which also serves as the hidden entryway for celebrities & others who don't want to make a big splash about them staying there. So I as swung the door to the hallway open & stepped into it at the same time....I literally come to within an eyelash of running into & running over Courtney Cox! Luckily we didn't crash especially since she was holding the hand of her child! Not the best way to meet a celebrity!

Careful What You Wish For

I believe in wishing & wishing BIG...but...I am always quoted as saying, "careful what you wish for" as I feel this is VERY much the truth. We often wander around carelessly throwing out wishes to the wind & never paying enough attention to what we are truly sending out into the world. Back in 2011, I was wishing things almost hourly. I was in a great job that completely took me for granted, I was constantly overworked & undermined...so I was wishing for a break from it all. I hardly got to spend much time with my boyfriend or family...so I wished that I could just relax & be with them as much as I wanted. These are only a few of the many wishes I was so carelessly throwing to the universe. Well...careful what you wish for...

 
It's now been 1 year, 9 months & 21 days or you might break it down further like 94 weeks or 660 days or 15,840 hours or 950,400 minutes or 57,024,000 seconds from this moment to when I last worked. On the night of May 15, many of my wishes were granted but in some of the weirdest of ways. That night I was granted a break...a complete & total break. Not only literally (my left ankle & left wrist) but a break from almost all responsibilities. I had to take time to heal therefore I had to stay still & relax....just as I wished. My partner & I were thrust into living with each every moment & we were under the watchful care of family...wish granted. I no longer had to worry about work or deal with all the issues that we driving me insane...another wish answered. But as I said...careful what you wish for...

I had so carelessly wished to be away from it all that I had forgotten that an open-ended wish comes with an open-ended answer. Due to the extensive injuries I sustained in the accident, I now can no longer do the job that I was able to do before. The time spent relaxing was also due to extreme pain. Time completely passed me by & I have spent 2 full summers stuck inside with no beach time, which I LOVE!  I missed the seasons changing & all the events that come with them. My boyfriend lost any alone time as he became my care giver in many more ways then even he bargained for. During this whole rest/break time don't think it wasn't spent without stress as that came by the buckets full! Wishing I now knew what to...wish for next...
 
Now, not all is lost in this open-ended wishing & not all is as miserable as one might think. For starters, my boyfriend & I are closer then we could be! We have a much better understanding of each others individualism & our love is stronger then ever. The family has truly come to my aid & stayed at my side through it all. If I hadn't gone through this ordeal I would not have slowed down enough to find & take care issues before they became full on wars. Opportunities are now knocking heavily on my door. Exciting new adventures that I may not have explored if I were still working under the demands of my job at the time. I now find myself on a few huge new journeys with bright new futures! All of which I may not have been ready for if I weren't all rested & fully eager for this newness. So like I said...WISH BIG...just...careful what you wish for.